Hey Everyone, It's the FNG
We started off my second day of man-work with a company meeting. We talked about the status of each of the jobs, safety issues, and my boss introduced me as the FNG. One of the Mexicans on the crew seemed particularly pleased to hear the news as it meant that he was promoted, and was no longer the FNG.
In case you've never worked on a construction site, the NG part means New Guy, and I'm sure you can deduce the F part. So, it's official now, I am the company FNG. That means if there is a shitty job that no one else wants to do, I get it. At some point, we will have a new person start working for us, and hence a different FNG. Until then, I'm it.
Being the FNG means that I will probably get to catch the most hell from the other guys. Construction workers like to bust balls, and if you’re the new guy, you’re a great target. While I know it’s all in good fun, I’m trying to avoid letting anyone know that I’m coming from cubicle-world. If their first impression of me is that I’m a pansy ass office worker, I’ll never earn their respect. I don’t want to end up like a friend of mine from college. He started working shortly after me for the last contractor I worked with, back in Illinois. He was the FNG, and wore some blue jeans that one of the old grizzled carpenters felt were a little too fancy for the worksite. My friend was dubbed “The Bitch,” by the aged journeyman, and the name stuck. This happened back in 1998, and the other workers in the crew that have been there since the beginning as we were, still refer to him as “The Bitch,” to this day. Things like that stick, and I’d definitely like to avoid being called, The Suit, Tie-Boy, Fancy-Man, or any other Spanish equivalent insult name if at all possible. After I’ve illustrated my willingness to work hard and get dirty with the rest of them, I can let them in on my past life, but for the time being I think it’s in my best interest to keep that to myself.
If there is a risky job that no one really feels comfortable doing, it gets passed to the FNG. Today, the boss said we need to use some 30-foot extension ladders to go up and sand off the end of these beams that stick out of the underside of the roof, I believe he called them outriggers (I try not to ask stupid questions like, “What are those beams called,” in front of the rest of the crew - no need to accentuate the FNG label.) Anyway, the ground in Tahoe is nowhere near being level; we live on mountains after all. As the boss explained the project, the crew just looked at me. I didn’t have time to get to it today, but it’s pretty clear that I’m going to be taking my fat ass up a rickety ladder planted on uneven soil – living on the edge I am. How often do you get an adrenaline rush in the office I ask you? My only hope of avoiding the treacherous task is that in the next day or two, we hire another person to take over my FNG position.
Work was good again, more power tools, dirt, and sawdust. My feet are really starting to hurt, and it feels like I'm going to have some blisters by tomorrow. I'll have to bust out the old Boy Scout trick of covering the blisters with Band-Aids and wearing two pairs of socks. (I've kept Band-Aids and a spare pair of socks in the truck the last couple of days just in case.)
My hands are also taking a serious beating, again no blisters as of yet, but they definitely hurt, and are way too susceptive to splinters and cuts. I’m not sure how long it will take to get my leather hands back, but I hope it’s soon. I’d wear gloves, but that’s a serious FNG giveaway.
Weight of the Day
Ok, so originally I thought it would be neat to get my weight at both the beginning and the end of the day. Really, I think it was just so I could eventually joke that I really did have some lead in my ass some day when I came home weighing more than I did in the morning. Now that I think about it, that joke really isn’t that funny, and my mind is way too clogged in the morning to write effectively.
From now on, I will just give the afternoon weight update. Incidentally, I weighed in at 179 after work. This is another reason I won’t be doing the twice daily readings; my weight simply doesn’t fluctuate enough during the day to make dual sets of data relevant. It’s wasted effort, and it robs me of a valuable snooze button push in the morning.
In case you've never worked on a construction site, the NG part means New Guy, and I'm sure you can deduce the F part. So, it's official now, I am the company FNG. That means if there is a shitty job that no one else wants to do, I get it. At some point, we will have a new person start working for us, and hence a different FNG. Until then, I'm it.
Being the FNG means that I will probably get to catch the most hell from the other guys. Construction workers like to bust balls, and if you’re the new guy, you’re a great target. While I know it’s all in good fun, I’m trying to avoid letting anyone know that I’m coming from cubicle-world. If their first impression of me is that I’m a pansy ass office worker, I’ll never earn their respect. I don’t want to end up like a friend of mine from college. He started working shortly after me for the last contractor I worked with, back in Illinois. He was the FNG, and wore some blue jeans that one of the old grizzled carpenters felt were a little too fancy for the worksite. My friend was dubbed “The Bitch,” by the aged journeyman, and the name stuck. This happened back in 1998, and the other workers in the crew that have been there since the beginning as we were, still refer to him as “The Bitch,” to this day. Things like that stick, and I’d definitely like to avoid being called, The Suit, Tie-Boy, Fancy-Man, or any other Spanish equivalent insult name if at all possible. After I’ve illustrated my willingness to work hard and get dirty with the rest of them, I can let them in on my past life, but for the time being I think it’s in my best interest to keep that to myself.
If there is a risky job that no one really feels comfortable doing, it gets passed to the FNG. Today, the boss said we need to use some 30-foot extension ladders to go up and sand off the end of these beams that stick out of the underside of the roof, I believe he called them outriggers (I try not to ask stupid questions like, “What are those beams called,” in front of the rest of the crew - no need to accentuate the FNG label.) Anyway, the ground in Tahoe is nowhere near being level; we live on mountains after all. As the boss explained the project, the crew just looked at me. I didn’t have time to get to it today, but it’s pretty clear that I’m going to be taking my fat ass up a rickety ladder planted on uneven soil – living on the edge I am. How often do you get an adrenaline rush in the office I ask you? My only hope of avoiding the treacherous task is that in the next day or two, we hire another person to take over my FNG position.
Work was good again, more power tools, dirt, and sawdust. My feet are really starting to hurt, and it feels like I'm going to have some blisters by tomorrow. I'll have to bust out the old Boy Scout trick of covering the blisters with Band-Aids and wearing two pairs of socks. (I've kept Band-Aids and a spare pair of socks in the truck the last couple of days just in case.)
My hands are also taking a serious beating, again no blisters as of yet, but they definitely hurt, and are way too susceptive to splinters and cuts. I’m not sure how long it will take to get my leather hands back, but I hope it’s soon. I’d wear gloves, but that’s a serious FNG giveaway.
Weight of the Day
Ok, so originally I thought it would be neat to get my weight at both the beginning and the end of the day. Really, I think it was just so I could eventually joke that I really did have some lead in my ass some day when I came home weighing more than I did in the morning. Now that I think about it, that joke really isn’t that funny, and my mind is way too clogged in the morning to write effectively.
From now on, I will just give the afternoon weight update. Incidentally, I weighed in at 179 after work. This is another reason I won’t be doing the twice daily readings; my weight simply doesn’t fluctuate enough during the day to make dual sets of data relevant. It’s wasted effort, and it robs me of a valuable snooze button push in the morning.
posted by fuqstik @ 8:18 PM
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